Month: July 2022

“I’m so sorry.”, she said, trying to sound convincing.

“No worry, what’s more enjoyable than a Champagne shower ?”,  jokingly answered Tyler.

Everybody around seemed to find him charming and so well mannered. She was absent mindingly looking at him and at the other guests interacting with him. She got more and more absorbed by her thoughts.

At that moment, it struck her : the ending was already different. He was not the charming handsome man she had fallen in love with anymore, he was Tyler, the egoistical control freak who used people as pawns at his convenience or just for the lulz. It was as if he was a completely different person now.

She started to wonder. How comes she was duped and so blind ? How comes nobody around seems to see him exactly as he is ? Or maybe they do, but they play pretend ? After all, it’s a work related event for most people here.

“Tyler had insisted a lot. Angelique’s boss told her to bring someone, it was compulsory. He knew she was single. He hinted that bringing her best friend would be best. It was all orchestrated from the start.”, she recalls.

It was as if her memories from the future were coming back. Maybe seeing him right in front of her triggered all those memories to come back. She wasn’t sure what was going on, but she was sure of the way he made her feel. She despised him. She started to despise him after she learned how much of a puppet master he was. She wasn’t even sure if he wanted to disrupt her career, for some reason, or if he just saw a live doll to control in her.

“…and I seized the opportunity. This industry is like a game and I’m quite an eager player.”, said Tyler.

“A player who downloaded the cracked version of the game with infinite energy and currency, and is still using cheat codes…”, she thought, while mechanically emptying her glass of Champagne.

She became more and more absorbed by her thoughts. Suddenly, she was there again. In those woods, nearby Seattle. In 2027. She had just found out the ugly truth about Tyler. What he’s done. Who he really was. How it started before they even met.

She was screaming and cussing at him. He was just standing there, silent. He would remain completely silent and unbothered when convenient to him, or when the person in front of him was trying to confront him. He had no remorse, no feelings towards others. Only he and people who idealize him mattered to him.

The more she screamed, the more he remained impassible and silent, even a bit content that he could trigger such a reaction in someone. He had nothing to gain from this situation, therefore he didn’t want to partake.

She started to beat him with the spade.

“You ruined everything !”, she screamed. “Why me ? Why orchestrate all of this ? Why couldn’t you just leave me alone ? I was doing fine. I was happy. You saw this and couldn’t take it ? The fact that I was happy ? You had to ruin all of this ? I wish I never met you !!!”

Tyler was lying on the floor, half conscious, bleeding a lot.

“I wish…” she said while beating him with more strength, as she was so angry about what he did that it literally made her lose her mind. “I wish I never met you…or that I just ran away that day,”, she screamed as she beat him to his death.

Right now, she was physically here though, right here at this event in Paris. It was as if her mind was wandering. She suddenly shook as if she was waking up from a bad dream. She made a funny face as she put her now empty glass on the waiter’s platter. She looked at Tyler, who was talking to Angelique’s boss and other guests.

“If you’ll excuse me.”, she said, while pointing to the restroom.

She walked towards the restroom. And then turned around. She looked from a distance at Tyler, Angelique’s boss and other guests chatting. She felt angry, sick and disgusted.

She kept walking. She walked down the stairs. She walked through the main entrance. She walked through the crowd outside. She walked to the subway station. She walked her way home. She then decided to pack her suitcase and go to the train station, take the night train to Lyon, to her parents house, and stay there for a while. She could write from there. And focus on good and positive things.

 

 

She was sitting in the tgv train. There was still 5 minutes before departure. It seemed like forever. It reminded her of the day, in this scary future she was running away from, when she took that plane to flee Seattle. It reminded her that her plan was to take the tgv to hide in Lyon. She was kind of hiding right now too, but this time, she was running away from a monster and a horrible future. She was set up to lose her soul, she had lost her mind instead.

She still didn’t understand what was going on. She just knew she had to leave for at least a while. He would be back tomorrow, he would try to set a rendez-vous with her, his plan would be set in action. She knew he wouldn’t dare to go to Lyon. She knew that after a while, he would eventually just pick another girl instead. Yeah, someone else, maybe…

She was lost in her thoughts. She felt relieved when she heard the warning alarm as the tgv doors were closing.

As the train was leaving, the memory of herself screaming in the woods was echoing in her mind :

“I wish I never met you or that I ran away that day.”

When she woke up, it was 9:20am. She turned the radio on. She was just lying in bed, closing her eyes and listening to music.

“And now it’s time for the 9:30 news flash”, said the radio host. “Today is February 27th 2025, the teachers strike is going on while…”

She suddenly opened her eyes and sat up.

“I’m back ? For real, this time ?”, she thought.

She got out of bed and started to cook eggs. She absentmindedly ate her breakfast. She still couldn’t shake off the memory of herself covered in blood in the woods. She was taken out of her thoughts by the beeping of her phone as she received a text. It was from Angélique. “Don’t forget about tonight’s reception at our office. I’d die of boredom if you don’t come. Nice opportunity to wear a pretty dress ;-)”

This made her smile. “Count on me”, she answered.

She went on with her day. Wrote a few things, corrected a few others.

She spent quite a while choosing what dress and shoes to wear. She went for a blue dress with white flowers printed on it, a white cardigan and white shoes.

“A red dress ? Seriously ?”, she thought, shaking her head.

She arrived at Angélique’s work place around 6 pm. A lot of people from big companies were invited. It was quite a huge reception, 200 people were expected.

“Even the big boss of Moonlight corporation will be here”, said Angélique.

Upon hearing this, she just froze.

“What am I supposed to do ?”, she thought. “Run away before any of this happens ? If I don’t meet him, I won’t kill him with a spade…”

She felt her heart racing. She was remembering that night in the woods, with all the blood. She was remembering every moments she time jumped into. She also remembered all the good things that were written in her diary and that she saw on Facebook.

“Could this be avoided ? Could it be fixed ? It takes 2 to make the effort… Can I just run away some time before May 23th 2025 if nothing has changed ? Would I be able to run away if I am in love ? Would he let me leave or try to control everything even more ? What really led me to kill him with a spade ? Is it supposed to happen no matter what ? Or did I jump in time so that it doesn’t happen ? What is the right move ? Is it fixable or should I just run away ?”

All of these thoughts were overwhelming her. But she knew she had to make a decision. Fast.

“Are you ok ?”, asked Angélique, “You look very pale”.

“I don’t know”, she answered. “Maybe I should just go home”

“Are you sure ?”, asked Angélique, disappointed.

“Yeah, sorry…”, she said, while trying to leave. The room was already filled with guests. She was so deeply into her thoughts, she didn’t see the waiter arriving from her left. She ran into him, causing him to spill all the drinks from his platter on the man in front of them.

“I’m so sorry”, she said to the waiter and to the man, who turned around, soaked in Champagne.

She stared at him for a while, he didn’t look angry. He smiled at her. She just felt like crying. It was too late.

“I’m sorry, Mr Harrison”, said Angélique, who followed her, wondering if she was alright. “Here are some napkins”, she continued, very embarrassed.

She didn’t say a word. She was looking at the floor, thinking of a way to escape. She knew it was too late already. She was worried about what would happen next.

“Are you ok ?”, asked Tyler.

She looked at him, with a terrified look in her eyes.

“Are you ok ?”, he asked again.

“Yes, sorry. I didn’t… Sorry.”

“Well, nevermind. Just keep me company for a while, then. It’s not like someone died or anything.”, he jokingly said.

She looked at him with a desperate expression on her face. She couldn’t refuse. She couldn’t run. All she could do was try and hope for the best. Hope for a different ending.

She felt trapped. She was obliged to stay, at least for now, as a courtesy to at least Angélique, whose boss ran across the room to see what was going on.

She read further. There weren’t much details, as she wouldn’t write everyday in her diary.

She decided to just let her mind wander and write whatever came to her mind. At this point, she knew she was probably going to wake up in the past…which was the future for her, since the last day she actually remembered was February 26th 2025.

She decided to take a break from her writing and play a game on a social media website. She had a instant message from Tyler. “Eager to have you with me in Los Angeles”.

“Of course…”, she thought.

She looked at his profile and at the few instant messages she got from him. He was very handsome and seemed very sweet.

“So, that’s the guy I killed with a spade…or will kill…”, she thought, quite sad.

“But in my diary and on social media, there are so many good memories. How could it end in a murder ?”

She tried to figure out. All of this jumps in time. There was something about that moment… Each of them…

“Hi princess”, typed Tyler in an instant message.

“Hi there”, she replied.

“Are you excited to come to Los Angeles ?”

“Wait, haven’t I not made my mind yet ?”, she thought. “How comes he acts as if I have already accepted ?”

“I’ve already arranged everything for you. I’ve found the perfect house in the perfect neighbourhood for you. I’ve hired a maid, so you don’t have to do any cleaning. Don’t worry, I got all the expenses.”, he continued.

She hesitated for a moment, as she wasn’t sure how to reply to that. It sounded sweet, but it sounded wrong in the meantime. She hadn’t even agreed yet. It felt like what she thought didn’t matter.

She could see how she would have accepted everything, even if she wasn’t really agreeing or happy about it. She was in love, therefore she was blinded. But at that very moment, there was no love, as she had no idea of what happened before, as she didn’t know him, as she hadn’t met him yet and thus hadn’t have the chance to fall in love with him yet. At that moment, she was actually the freest she could be to make her own mind. He couldn’t influence her life choices as he didn’t matter to her yet. She wouldn’t make silly decisions out of love as she wasn’t in love yet.

These crazy situations, those jumps in time were a blessing. Not only did she know what would happen, what would go wrong, but she was also very free to make her own mind.

“Or maybe you could just come here ?”, she answered. “We could work together, here”.

“What do you mean ?”, he replied

“I mean, there are other ways…”

“Let’s talk about it later, I’ve got to go”, she continued, as she knew she was missing too many pieces of information to have this discussion.

She lied down on her bed for a while, letting her mind wander, until she fell asleep.

She woke up at her desk. She moved the computer mouse and checked the screen. She had fallen asleep while writing a script.

“Ouch”, she thought, as she was all achy after sleeping in such a position.

She looked around her.

“I’m back ! I’m in France. Home sweet home”.

She felt relieved for a minute. But then realised she had no recollection of writing what she had just read from her computer screen. She checked the time : “October 17th, 2025”. It was 9 am.

“It’s not over”, she sighted.

“Nobody to cook breakfast for me. At least I’m free to chose and do what I want”.

She received a text from Angélique “Are you free for lunch ? Meet you at 12 at the bus station near our office ?”.

She was happy to be able to talk to her friend. Maybe she would be able to get some answers. This wasn’t making much sense. Or was it ? It felt like a puzzle, as if those moments were the keys, the answers, or maybe the questions she needed to ask herself. She still wasn’t sure if she wasn’t just losing her mind or drugged up, though.

She met Angélique at 12 pm. They decided to go to a brasserie and get a simple roasted chicken with fries and lettuce.

“Have you made your mind yet ?”, asked Angélique.

“About ?”

“Ha, you’re funny. As if it would get out of your mind. You know what I think about it. Your best opportunities are here. What could you do in Los Angeles ? They’re all about appearances, shallowness and “beauty”, there. It’s not about art, it’s about money and “fame”, for whatever it means. I know you like money too, but I also know very well that you wouldn’t sell your soul for it. Plus, I would miss you so much !”

“Ah, yeah. I don’t know. It’s tempting, but is it really what I want ? I’m still thinking about it.”

“I’m glad you’ve started to actually think about it, instead of just listening to what he says. No offense, but he seems quite controlling. Be careful not to end up being his little puppet. I know how unhappy you would be.”, said Angélique

“Well…” She still didn’t really know what to say, since she still had no clue what was going on. She had no clue about the actual situation, about who this Tyler really was.

“I know you love him”, said Angélique, “but don’t lose yourself or take decisions that would make you very unhappy, it would just be the end of your relationship.”

“I know.”, she said.

“Well, time to go back to work”, said Angélique. “You’re lucky you can arrange your own schedule”.

She walked Angélique to her office and then just went back home.

“How am I supposed to take a decision when I don’t know what happened before ?”, she thought.

She decided to check her diary and see if she could get some pieces of information. “How am I supposed to take a decision when I have no idea what is going to happen in the future. It’s frightening.” is what she had written in the latest entry.

“Huh… That’s ironic”, she thought.